Monday, May 23, 2011

NO FUMAR


Back in college, I read or heard somewhere that if you quit smoking by the age of 25, your lungs could eventually reverse all the effects of having been a smoker. I never looked into it any further, and I'm not entirely sure it holds any ground, but it became my mantra and my excuse. I could continue smoking until I turned 25, and then simply give it up.

Well, my 25th year came and went. But it was just too hard, smoking was part of my identity, one of the first character traits I developed the year I began to figure myself out. Not only that, but I seriously enjoy the act of smoking. Now I'm 26 and quite possibly going through one of those quarter-life crisis thingies. Bottom line: it's time for a change.

I've been toying with the idea of giving up the habit for months, but as I've told everyone around me who's expressed concern, I wasn't going to be successful until I was ready. I needed to be committed.

I got a pretty bad cold last week. It had me cut back to about one or two cigarettes a day. Any smoker can tell you that our colds last a bit longer than those of non-smokers. There's the duration of the bug and all its nagging symptoms, and then there's the relentless cough that carries on for at least a week after everything should be out of our system.

In the midst of a phlegm attack, lying in bed one night, I just decided that it was time. I wanted to be healthy again. I wanted to be able to run greater distances, climb stairs without getting winded and even hit some of those high notes Jason Mraz is constantly taunting me with, reminding me of my past glory. More importantly, with my bank account depleting so quickly and no sign of a job just yet, I don't want to spend another dime on a pointless bad habit. So I stopped.

It's day three. I still don't feel like a non-smoker. My poor lungs won't let me, and neither will my nerves. I feel almost crippled by my fragile emotional state and I am constantly coughing up phlegm. It's disgusting and painful. But It's part of the process, and so in essence, progress. Plus, I think I'm getting a pretty intense ab workout.

Anyway, I wanted deliver the memo here on my blog. That way the cat is out of the bag and I actually have to hold myself to it. Also, quitting isn't the only change I'm undertaking. Another important one is writing more. And if I have the will power to quit cold turkey, the simple act of writing more often doesn't seem so unobtainable, does it?

That's all for now, writing just makes me want a cigarette!

2 comments:

  1. Because you know how anti-smoking I am and how one of my main life struggles is the fact that I MARRIED a smoker, then you know what I'm thinking. I want you to quit even more than you want to quit!! I also always struggle with a big giant "Oh yeah right, there goes another smoker trying to quit for three days." and of course the "I"ll believe it when I see it". But I don't want to doubt you just to be proven right. I want you to break that assumption I have and actually, successfully, become a happy healthy NON-SMOKER!!!! You can do it and I love you!!! And you know this means that David has to quit too.

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  2. You are doing great Peter. I know it sucks... even reading your post makes me miss it just a little bit. You know how much I LOVED to smoke, and look at me! You will get through this tough spot and be 100% ok in no time. Soon enough you will be running and singing just like your old self :) I'm really proud of you! Love you!

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