Friday, April 16, 2010


Last night, after watching the first part of the Project Runway finale with Katie, she had me watch "her boyfriend", who happens to have his own show! His name is Demetri Martin, heard of him? He's hi-LAR-ious! The episode's theme was "two". (The first one, as he cleverly made two episodes featuring that theme.) So I decided I'd try out a two-themed post.

The amount of months left until I leave on a jet plane. I honestly don't know when I'll be back again.

The amount of weeks left until I put in my notice at work. I'm trying to feign the minimal amount of dedication for now, but when I'm no longer hiding my immediate departure, I don't think anything will get me to focus. (Anyone got any Adderall?)

The amount of eyes I have. Also the amount of eyes David has. And I suppose the amount of pairs we have combined! [elaboration below]

David asked me to tell him a story (of us) before we said good night this evening. The one that came to mind was a particular evening on which he was playing my guitar and serenading me. For the first time in a long time (and at that level, my whole life) I was inspired—compelled—to write.

I wrote a poem about what it felt like to hold his gaze. I wrote of past romances, in which I'd have moments where it seemed like we were truly connected through each others' eyes, but then inevitably reality would cut the tie, and I'd be left wondering whether he was really feeling what I had been at all. It's not like this with him. He just draws me deeper and deeper, neither one of us with any intention of letting go. We can get lost in our eyes for hours.

And then I realised, as I've often before. We haven't been able to do this since that tragic scene in the airport. Skype, iChat and other conferencing applications are amazing, and help couples like us to maintain some degree of sanity in hard times. But their most unfortunate downfall (except maybe frequent, broken connections) is that the only way to appear to be looking into the other's eyes is to look directly at the camera. When this occurs, you can no longer see the eyes of the person you're looking at. It may seem trivial, but trust me, it can be agonizing. But hey, only two more months! If only time weren't subjective!


  1. Here's his "2" story I was gushing about. Amazing.

  2. Oooh the looking into the camera/each others eyes thing is crazy. I never thought of that!